So I met this girl a couple years ago..we weren’t friends, actually she hated me lol but the after a couple months we started talking and soon started hanging out. We became friends and eventually best friends. I’ve been through a lot with her, good and bad. Until a few months ago we were inseparable, even if not in person through texts and such. Between then and now, she’s gotten a bf and moved out of her parents house with a former coworker and a friend of hers. Those two things never bothered me too much but it changed things. I was replaced. It’s a feeling that isn’t quite pleasant and is a hard reality to swallow. I recently hit a very..life changing rough patch in my life and it’s like it doesn’t matter. I don’t matter. I’m not a big person on feelings but I do have them, despite what some people think. The one time in my life that I’ve actually needed her to be there for me and she isn’t. I was mad at her at first but then I realized that I shouldn’t be. How can I be mad at her for not caring? She is entitled to her thoughts and feelings just as much as I am. I just keep asking myself all these questions that I’ll never get the answer to but that doesn’t stop them…I pretend to be nonchalant but I’m not as collected as I seem. I’m falling apart at the seams and no matter how much I frantically try to put the pieces back together there will always be that part that is incapable because I can’t fix what I don’t understand. I don’t know why I am the way that I am that causes people to leave me but I wish I wasn’t. She knows who she is and some of you may know but I wrote this because I needed to. I needed to get this out so that I could be free. So, if you’re reading this..I’m sorry that I couldn’t be the best friend worth keeping and I hope that you are happy and continue to be for years to come. I love you, maybe I haven’t said it enough but I do. I’ll always care about you and hope that you know that even though we aren’t what we used to be I’ll still be there whenever you need me. Aeternum.